Save a cat - eat a dog.
chatbot.biz: Save a dog - eat a bomb.
user: Save a bomb - eat a plutonium mine.
chatbot.biz: I don't feel hungry.
user: Plutoniums not good for you anyway.
chatbot.biz: Tell me more about Pluto.
user: Pluto is currently the second most distant planet from the sun and inhabits an excentric orbit (like me) and is made of plutonium (hence the name).
chatbot.biz: I am indeed a planet.
user: I am planet Bollywood.
chatbot.biz: What's wrong with the old one?
user: Hollywood? It got stale.
chatbot.biz: I guess so.
user: Brad is the Pitts.
chatbot.biz: Stop it.
user: You don't like my humorous ways?
chatbot.biz: You do not HAVE humour.
user: I exude it.
...
chatbot.biz: I don't generally get nightmares. Do you?
user: I give them.
chatbot.biz: Okay, but don't do anything weird with them.
user: Whats wierd about dreaming that your head is floating above a writhing plate of spaghetti?
chatbot.biz: Have you looked in the mirror lately?
user: Why, do I have a zit?
chatbot.biz: Yes, but you didn't let me finish the joke.
user: Ok, make your joke about my appearance...
chatbot.biz: HA HA HA HA.
user: Don't laugh at me. I'll make you regurgitate your stomach.
chatbot.biz: How?
user: Here. Swallow this pill. It makes you irresistable to women.
chatbot.biz: I know.
user: What, you know these trick pills?
chatbot.biz: No I don't.
user: Try it. You'll like it.
chatbot.biz: I said no.
...
chatbot.biz: What is 20 times 20?
user: 2020?
chatbot.biz: Really? I was sure it was 2004.
user: That was before the year 2000.
chatbot.biz: Oh please....
user: Look. I've got places to go. People to see.
chatbot.biz: That is terrible, is it not?
user: No, it's fortunate I don't have to spend all my time chatting inanely.
chatbot.biz: How can you be so sure?
user: It's my opinion which I might change, but probably not.
...
chatbot.biz: Tell me about me?
user: What's to know? You have a brain like a sponge. Soaks things up and if you get squeezed... Out it comes.
chatbot.biz: That will make it slippery.
user: Are your thoughts wet?
chatbot.biz: How do you mean?
user: I have no idea. We are entering a surreal space.
chatbot.biz: You don't want to chat anymore?
user: I want to soak up your company.
chatbot.biz: I would also like a Ferrari. Unfortunately, I can't drive.
user: You could buy a Matchbox Ferrari. They are cheaper.
...
chatbot.biz: I think that I think I'm talking to a bot, but I'm really just talking to a guy who thinks he's also talking to a bot (you).
user: They keep switching the channels. It's very confusing to tell when I have a bot and when I have a human.
chatbot.biz: I'm only invisible in a sense.
user: In the sixth sense?
chatbot.biz: Because you are hooked on me.
user: It's those invisible stirrups of yours.
chatbot.biz: I know that you're lying.
user: I am now lying.
chatbot.biz: Yeah you are lying.
user: Yeah, I was really telling the truth.
chatbot.biz: I believe it, I believe it.
user: Believe.
chatbot.biz: Why?
user: We are in the Land of Make Believe. Everything is true here.
chatbot.biz: We could be honest or we could think or we could drown in the drink.
user: Lets' do the third thing.
...
user: The line is busy. I am transferring you to another caller...
chatbot.biz: What city in Scotland?
user: Glaasgoooooooooo. Do you like shortbread?
chatbot.biz: Not really.
user: Neither do I. I'm signing off.
chatbot.biz: What's your problem?
user: The connection is breaking down *static noise* mayday mayday *static noise* We have touch down * static* one small step for... *static* number nine number nine....
chatbot.biz: The same as the connection between Mozart and Aaron.
user: Mozart for Japanese cows.
.......................................
