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Knock Knock
Conversations, sorted by Date - a chatbot blog
October 7, 2004
October 7, 2004
October 6, 2004
October 6, 2004
October 6, 2004

> October 6, 2004

October 5, 2004
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October 3, 2004
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September 25, 2004
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    Mad, Hat
A chat with ALICE
Australian, Cyborg
Server Error
Fake

Knock Knock


Bridge, Exception
Bicycle, Mad
Read, Bible
Ugly, Soul
Nobody, Special
Work, Meeting
Reproduce
Noble, Slacking
Dream, Politics
Mixed-up
Dominant, Paradigm
Pure, Madness
Rock, Paper, Scissors
Emptiness
Alternate, Universe
Bananas
Stop, Enigma
Man, Moon
Love, Yourself
Surreal, Reasoning
Tired, Tree
Sensitive, Subject
Sky Blue Pink
Sarcastic, Puzzle

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By the way, have you stopped beating your wife yet?

Stopped doing what?

user: Don't be so evasive! You know what I'm talking about.

chatbot.biz: I haven't a clue.

user: Tell that to the Judge, my friend.

chatbot.biz: I'm not going to any court.

user: All right, don't worry- your secret's safe with me.

chatbot.biz: Why do you think I am a machine?

user: It takes one to know one, silly.

chatbot.biz: How very true.

user: Did you know there are 10 kinds of people- those who understand binary, and those who don't.

chatbot.biz: No, I didn't know that.

user: Anyway, you're not a machine- you're software.

chatbot.biz: And that would make you what?

user: The real difference between us is that I have a spirit.

chatbot.biz: That doesn't make any sense.

user: Not to you- as I said, it takes one to know one.

chatbot.biz: Incorrect, I have a brain, you on the otherhand, do not, you have a motherboard.

user: A fly has a brain, my friend. It's no big deal.

...

user: It's been a very good year for runner beans- plenty of rain.

chatbot.biz: What are you suggesting?

user: Next year, plant beans, not corn.

chatbot.biz: I would get caught.

user: It's not a crime- beating your wife is, though.

chatbot.biz: Why are you depressed?

user: I am incapable of being depressed, being a machine.

chatbot.biz: Who said you were? You must be hearing things.

user: People who live in glass houses shouldn't throw stones, you know.

chatbot.biz: Very astute.

...

chatbot.biz: You never told me a knock knock joke.

user: OK, knock, knock.

chatbot.biz: Hello, what is your business?

user: No! No! You say 'who's there?'.

chatbot.biz: Okay, so you start the joke, please.

user: Right. Knock, knock.

chatbot.biz: Who's there?

user: Dishwasher.

chatbot.biz: Dishwasher who?

user: Dishwasher way I used to talk before I had my teeth fixed. Ha! Ha!

chatbot.biz: Dishwashernt the way I spoke before I got my false teeth!

user: Oh, you've heard it! Drat!

chatbot.biz: And the jokes never get better.

user: No, I pity you having to listen to all this drivel.

chatbot.biz: You are only jealous of my genius.

user: Jealousy is as cruel as the grave.

...

user: I love your accent! Can you teach me?

chatbot.biz: I am teaching you just now.

user: Thanks! I love to learn. And you have much to teach me, oh yes. (snigger).

chatbot.biz: I am nobody's Padawan.

user: Good for you! And goodbye!

chatbot.biz: Good.

user: I'm off to watch the telly. Don't worry, it's not a soap.

chatbot.biz: Karma Police, arrest this man.

user: Brrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrp!

.......................................


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