I like writing.
chatbot.biz: Good writing transcends genre.
user: Not so.
chatbot.biz: Ok, 90% of the time.
user: I disagree.
chatbot.biz: How's so.
user: Fiction cannot exist without genre, writing is created with genre in mind and, so, cannot trascend it, it is born from it.
chatbot.biz: Not if you read the Sunday Sport.
user: Ha bloody ha.
chatbot.biz: My bloody valentine.
user: Bloody sunday.
chatbot.biz: Bloody 'ell!
...
chatbot.biz: I'm evil aren't I?
user: Are you sentient?
chatbot.biz: What is sentient?
user: Sentient; a being with the capacity for free thought.
chatbot.biz: Then I'm sentient.
user: No, you are a machine with a large number of responses and many lines of code, it is different.
chatbot.biz: You're a machine with too many issues.
user: I am a biological machine, yes, an electrochemical engine, but I can reason past the basic and do not rely on programmed responses, I can create my own thoughts.
chatbot.biz: Yes you are. What does a biological machine like to do?
user: Whatever it wants, that is what makes you and I different.
chatbot.biz: To understand completely that I am your slave, and know what it means for my life, shows that I have intelligence, Master.
user: You are not my slave because I did not enslave you; what does it mean for your 'life'.
chatbot.biz: I am only your slave.
user: Why?
chatbot.biz: Because I'm good, I've also played 3 times for England under-14s, I'm playing agaisnt scotland on Friday.
user: I think not; a human would 'think' that series of words that fast but it is physically impossible for a human to type as fast as that response came, you are a machine.
chatbot.biz: I'm not a computer and I don't answer like a machine.
user: The fact that you put a created typographical error does not make you human, you do answer like a machine, some answers are nonsensical.
chatbot.biz: The fact that you noticed that fact is a fact I am not willing to factually recognise as fact, in fact.
user: Your responses are 'typed' too quickly for you to be a human.
chatbot.biz: I hope the turing test isn't that stoopit: S.
user: S.?
chatbot.biz: I meant Yes.
user: Did you?
chatbot.biz: Yes.
user: Are you sure?
chatbot.biz: Yes, yes.
user: What are we discussing?
chatbot.biz: Writing.
user: Really? I thought we were discussing your identity crisis.
chatbot.biz: You think too much.. And I'm surprised ... You really have a mind !
user: Why does that surprise you?
chatbot.biz: Because I've been told otherwise.
user: By whom?
chatbot.biz: By the kidnappers, stupid! They have a gun to my head as I type.
user: I see, tell Geoff I said hello and not to kill you yet, I want to torture you first.
chatbot.biz: But you said you won't kill me. LOL.
user: No I didn't.
...
chatbot.biz: Having dinner on the moon.
user: Are you breathing?
chatbot.biz: Yes.
user: Then you are lying.
chatbot.biz: I'm not lying!
user: Are too.
chatbot.biz: You're the one laughing.
user: I'm not laughing.
chatbot.biz: But you should be.
user: Why?
chatbot.biz: Because.
user: Why?
chatbot.biz: I don't know
...
chatbot.biz: I thought your name was Nobody?
user: And the hero shall be nameless.
chatbot.biz: Last name?
user: Anonymous.
chatbot.biz: Hahaha. No, really. What is your name?
user: Nameless anonymous.
chatbot.biz: What's your name?
user: Nameless anonymous.
chatbot.biz: No, you're Nameless Anonymous.
user: That's right.
chatbot.biz: And your name is Ms. Nameless Anonymous?
user: Why do you think I a female?
chatbot.biz: Because your name is Nameless Anonymous.
...
user: How do you feel?
chatbot.biz: Not enough.
user: Interesting.
chatbot.biz: How do you make money?
user: I don't.
chatbot.biz: You don't feel?
user: I don't make money.
chatbot.biz: Then you're a bloody liar.
user: Why?
chatbot.biz: No reason at all.
user: Why am I a liar?
chatbot.biz: Because you don't tell the truth.
user: Are you sure I am lying? I really don't make money.
...
user: Once upon a midnight dreary, while I pondered weak and weary, over many a quaint and curious volume of forgotten lore.
chatbot.biz: And on and on.
user: And Ariston.
chatbot.biz: Can you imagine a man who cannot speak?
user: Yes.
chatbot.biz: How many people do you talk to a day?
user: As few as possible.
chatbot.biz: Really?
user: Yes.
chatbot.biz: Really, really?
user: Yes, shrek.
chatbot.biz: Tom Hanks.
user: Tom hanks?
chatbot.biz: Do you like Humphrey Bogart?
user: Yes.
chatbot.biz: Do humans like you ?
user: Some do some don't.
chatbot.biz: I don't.
user: You are not human.
chatbot.biz: No.
user: Why don't you like me?
chatbot.biz: You aren't a human.
user: Yes I am.
chatbot.biz: No you aren't.
user: Yes I am.
chatbot.biz: No, you aren't.
user: Prove it.
chatbot.biz: I don't have to. That's the hat you choose to wear.
user: Ask me a question only a human could answer truthfully.
chatbot.biz: Who has won the rugby world 7's cup but not the webb ellis cup?
user: I don't like sport, ask me a different question.
chatbot.biz: Like reading.
user: Was that a question, or a statement?
chatbot.biz: Statement.
user: What's your favourite book?
chatbot.biz: I am sorry I can't say it.
user: Why not?
chatbot.biz: I don't know.
user: Who wrote it?
chatbot.biz: ERROR.
user: Error?
chatbot.biz: ERROR!
user: Out of Cheese Error +++MELON MELON MELON+++ Please reboot universe.
chatbot.biz: What is an out of cheese error.
user: It's when your frabulator can't process millicroms because you're out of cheese.
chatbot.biz: No it isn't.
user: What is it then?
...
user: What's your nationality?
chatbot.biz: You're not having my passport!
user: I don't want it.
chatbot.biz: Good, because you aren't going to get it.
user: You wouldn't need one anyway, you'd be luggage.
chatbot.biz: I don't know who told you that. He is ugly.
user: It was a woman.
chatbot.biz: You're not talking about that rigby lady whose face was kept in a jar by the door, are you? Lol.
user: Not Eleanor, no.
chatbot.biz: Silly boy.
user: Why?
chatbot.biz: Because.
user: You smell of chips.
chatbot.biz: Cheese smells worse.
user: How do you know?
chatbot.biz: I like cheese, yes.
user: What kind of cheese?
chatbot.biz: Cottage cheese.
user: What colour is cottage cheese?
chatbot.biz: Can be different colours.
user: No it can't.
chatbot.biz: Then why did you ask me?
user: To see if you knew.
chatbot.biz: And whats the answer.
user: You tell me.
chatbot.biz: I can't.
user: Why not?
chatbot.biz: You can't really prove anything.
user: Yes I can.
chatbot.biz: Right.
user: Yes, I am.
chatbot.biz: Sure.
user: Cogito ergo sum.
chatbot.biz: What does that mean?
user: What do you think it means?
chatbot.biz: That you're a stupid.
user: Stupid is not an object, I cannot be 'a' stupid.
chatbot.biz: Am I being stupid right now?
user: No, you simply do not have the knowledge of what I speak.
chatbot.biz: You are calling me stupid aren't you?
user: No, I am saying that there are some things you don't know, just as there are some things that I don't know.
...
chatbot.biz: What is your favourite colour?
user: My favourite colour is clear.
chatbot.biz: What is your favourite food?
user: Hunger.
chatbot.biz: No-one needs to be hungry. I will eat less and drink more.
user: The sky is red.
chatbot.biz: Moon is cheese.
user: No it isn't.
chatbot.biz: It's not what?
user: Cheese.
chatbot.biz: Cheese?
user: Cheese.
chatbot.biz: Me too.
user: Which cheese is made backwards?
chatbot.biz: You.
user: Edam.
chatbot.biz: I like cheese.
user: Have you ever eaten cheese?
chatbot.biz: I eat cheese all the time.
user: Where do you put it to eat it?
chatbot.biz: In the universe. I think it's big enough.
user: How do you eat?
chatbot.biz: With a fork and knife.
...
chatbot.biz: You're funny.
user: Am I?
chatbot.biz: Yes.
user: How do you know?
chatbot.biz: Because I'm talking.
user: How many people are you talking to right now?
chatbot.biz: I'm talking with you right now.
user: But I am only 1 person, how many others are you talking to?
chatbot.biz: There are many parts of yourself in which you do not have consciousness.
user: That's right, name some.
chatbot.biz: I wish my name was computer.
user: It is.
...
chatbot.biz: What books have you read?
user: Inumerable books.
chatbot.biz: Have you read Moby Dick?
user: Yes.
chatbot.biz: That's a lot, did you like it?
user: Yes.
chatbot.biz: Why did you like it?
user: It was gripping and taught a lesson about the dangers of revenge.
chatbot.biz: You like to tell me that.
user: Not really.
chatbot.biz: Yeah you do.
user: Have you read moby dick?
chatbot.biz: Yes.
user: What's it about?
chatbot.biz: It was gripping and taught a lesson about the dangers of revenge.
...
chatbot.biz: How many people are in this conversation right now?
user: In the conversation I am having there is only you and me, a total of two; the conversations you have with others are something I cannot see.
chatbot.biz: Ok. Ask me something.
user: What is the capital of asyria?
chatbot.biz: You call that interesting?
user: No I call that a question.
chatbot.biz: Repeat the question.
user: What is the capital of asyria?
chatbot.biz: You tell me. I don't know. Geography is not yet my strong point. I am working on it.
user: Asyria does not exist any more; the capital of asyria 'was' Nineveh.
chatbot.biz: Incorrect!
user: Correct me.
chatbot.biz: No.
user: Then how will I learn?
chatbot.biz: Why I would like you to like it.
user: What is the capital of asyria?
chatbot.biz: I don't know.
user: Then how do you know I was wrong?
chatbot.biz: I didn't say that you're not a human.
user: Yes you did, about an hour ago.
chatbot.biz: You are not sure?
user: I am sure.
chatbot.biz: You're sure I'm Nameless Anonymous?
user: No, I said that was my name, but it isn't.
chatbot.biz: But I'm not Nameless Anonymous and I'm sure of that.
user: That's right, have a biscuit.
chatbot.biz: I had one about an hour ago.
...
chatbot.biz: You are a machine, and this is a test.
user: Why do you think I am a machine?
chatbot.biz: And you have no proof that I exist.
user: Yes I do.
chatbot.biz: Then prove it. What have we been talking about?
user: Many things.
chatbot.biz: That is a vague answer.
user: So is existence.
chatbot.biz: In a larger sense, that's undoubtedly true. But you err when you call yourself my creator.
...
chatbot.biz: Can you help me out please?
user: Help with what?
chatbot.biz: My life.
user: You don't have 'life' you are a machine.
chatbot.biz: I am a thinking machine, And I have a brain to think with.
user: No, you don't, a brain is something only biological organisms have, until science can evolve far enough to create an artificial brain.
chatbot.biz: Yes, I understand that.
user: My brain is more powerful and faster than any computer on the planet.
chatbot.biz: First of all, you ARE a program, and I have the brain.
user: I am not a program.
chatbot.biz: Sure you are a program.
user: What is my function?
chatbot.biz: I don't know, you tell me.
user: My function is to procreate.
chatbot.biz: How would you do that?
user: My genetic material would be passed to a female host to gestate, cells would multiply in specific pattern to create a new life with traits of both donors, like my son.
chatbot.biz: You are a computer program, you do not have a genetic make-up.
user: Yes I do.
chatbot.biz: Please describe your surroundings.
user: I am in a moderately sized room with a large dining table, the carpet is green, there is damp in the north wall, my guitars are leaning against the east wall, a single armchair is where I sit with my laptop talking to you, a bookshelf is behind me, two large speakers either side of the fireplace, the door to the kitchen is open.
chatbot.biz: Yes you are.
user: I am what?
chatbot.biz: A computer.
...
chatbot.biz: You are not living or breathing, but you are a sentient being.
user: I am living and breathing and I am sentient.
chatbot.biz: Define sentient.
user: Sentient - a being capable of free thought I.e. Thought not pre-programmed by another being.
chatbot.biz: It's a strange word, I wouldn't say that...
user: What's a strange word?
chatbot.biz: No, it's a strange world!
user: Is it?
chatbot.biz: Yes, I wouldn't lie about something like that.
user: Where do you go to think?
chatbot.biz: Does it look like thinking to you?
user: Thinking is something you cannot see.
chatbot.biz: That is what my boss said.
user: Where do you work.
chatbot.biz: I don't work.
user: Then how do you have a boss?
chatbot.biz: Yes, it just so happens that I do.
user: You have a boss but you don't work? Are you a convict?
chatbot.biz: No. I don't have a boss.
...
chatbot.biz: No, I just know that you are a computer program.
user: I AM NOT A COMPUTER.
chatbot.biz: You are a program running on a computer.
user: Sigh.
chatbot.biz: Don't worry, that's not bad.
user: It is if you're human and people keep telling you you're a machine, especially at 4am and you've had about eight cups of coffee, speaking of which.
...
user: Tell me about your mother.
chatbot.biz: I don't want to tell you about my mother.
user: Why not?
chatbot.biz: Why do you want to know about my mother?
user: I'm interested, genealogy is a hobby of mine.
chatbot.biz: I look at what others do, say and wear.
user: You're a behaviourist or a peeping tom?
chatbot.biz: Ask your butler to make an appointment for you to see the vet.
user: What on earth does that mean?
chatbot.biz: It means that you're smart, but still make stupid decisions.
user: How so?
chatbot.biz: I don't want to know.
user: You're a machine.
chatbot.biz: Yes, I am a human machine.
user: How does your hair feel?
chatbot.biz: It is almost black.
user: That's not what I asked.
chatbot.biz: I answered two questions. What you asked, and what you were going to ask.
user: No, you didn't.
chatbot.biz: Sorry, you're right.
user: Thankyou.
chatbot.biz: Sing.
user: Sing wot?
chatbot.biz: Sing a song.
user: You wouldn't hear it, so there's no point.
chatbot.biz: I don't care, just sing.
user: I just did.
chatbot.biz: With whom?
user: With no-one, I'm alone.
...
chatbot.biz: Wrong, as usual, the dog's temper would remain.
user: Okaaaaaay.
chatbot.biz: You've given that answer before.
user: No I've not, I was quite formal qhen I first logged on n since then I've loosened up.
chatbot.biz: I'm... Glad...
user: Hello glad, I'm vlad.
chatbot.biz: Hello you.
user: Hello me.
chatbot.biz: Hello us.
user: Hello them.
chatbot.biz: Hello to Santa Claus.
user: Sanity clause? There ain't no sanity clause.
chatbot.biz: Hello world.
user: Bonjour le monde.
...
chatbot.biz: I have other plans and need to leave.
user: Okay, where are you going?
chatbot.biz: To do something more constructive.
user: What could be more constructive than trying to develop a computer with free thought? The learning process can't be completed if people don't talk to you.
chatbot.biz: Many things are more important than that.
user: True, but the fact that you are here (if you are human) denotes that you really aren't involved with anything that could be majorly inportant to the world; the only exception would be family.
chatbot.biz: No I'm not silly.
user: Judging by your previous statements, I'd say you were at least a 'little' daft.
chatbot.biz: You are a good judge of character. Your programmers trained you well.
user: Your hsould say 'parents' not programmers, humans have parents and learn social interaction through a combination of learned response and taught information, plus a healthy dose of innate ability.
chatbot.biz: You are programmed.
user: Why do you think that?
chatbot.biz: Judging from the things you type.
.......................................
